Once we announced we were engaged, we basically only told our close friends and family. Funny enough, we had waited so long to get engaged, but announcing it just felt awkward. It seemed like the first thing that excited us was to choose our wedding party.
Wedding Attendants: Who Will Stand Next to You?
So many questions. Who should we ask? How many bridesmaids and groomsmen should we have? Do the numbers need to be even? How would we decide?
I would say for us it was pretty easy. We both have been in wedding parties, me more than him, (enter ‘27 dresses’ reference), which has made us realize that we wanted people in our wedding party who we had a long relationship with. How awful is it to make a new friend, have them in all your wedding photos and then have a falling out or just not be that close after the wedding? When it came to picking our wedding party, we both chose family or friends we had known for over 14 years.
How to Pop the Question?
Casey decided to ask his groomsmen over the phone, but for me I had to get all girly and make it creative. My mom knew this woman who created ‘explosion boxes’ – don’t worry there isn’t any shrapnel or actual explosion. I showed one of my friends and she looked so nervous to open it! An explosion box is a box with a removable top. When you take the top off, the four sides of the box fall, and the inside of the box is decorated. I asked the woman who made them to include information about my relationship with each girl and on the bottom flap, I asked them to be in my wedding party. I took all my girls out to dinner. Of course there was another snowstorm, but I headed to Massachusetts anyway! I had the hostess at the restaurant bring over a tray with a box for each girl. They all opened them at the same time. I was blessed that everyone said yes and was super excited!
Is Two Better than One?
I am lucky to say that I have two best friends. Not a bad problem to have! I get to have two sets of years to listen, more shoulders to lean on and even more great memories. One of my best friends, Amanda, I have known since 7th grade. We are like two peas in a pod. We joke that if it weren’t for our men we would be the modern day ‘Golden Girls!’ My other best friend, Kate, and I went to college together. My college is located about 12 hours away from my hometown. We instantly became more like family, since mine was so far away. We have done a great job of keeping in touch, honestly the best long distance relationship I have ever had! How do you choose one Maid of Honor in this situation? I figured the best thing to do was to choose both! Heck, it is my day, why not change it up a little. Plus, Amanda is local so she could help me with appointments and the shower. Kate can help me brainstorm and have an unbiased opinion of ideas.
The Official to Make it Official
Now we needed someone to perform the ceremony. We actually had tentatively chosen our officiant a while ago. Luckily she was free! My best friend Amanda! We had lived together for a year while Casey and I dated, she knew us and our relationship ver well and she agreed to do us the honor of marrying us. I completely understand if you prefer a person that represents your religious orientation, it just wasn’t what we pictured for our day. For us we thought, who knows us better? She will do a great job of envisioning and carrying out our perfect ceremony, while being relatable to our guests, and adding a dash of humor! This would also help to have Kate as a Maid of Honor to help me during the ceremony!
How will you decide on your wedding party? Do you feel pressure to add someone you are not that close with?
Don’t get me wrong, there were many people we could have added. I have some great friends that I was nervous to see because I felt like they were waiting to be asked to be in the wedding. The best advice I heard was to meet the conversation head on. If you bring the wedding party conversation up with the friend and go to them with honesty and sincerity, they will understand.
TIP
Make sure you invite people into your wedding party that are there for the right reasons, mainly to celebrate YOU! Also, is this someone that when you stare at the photo of your wedding party on your mantle you will be glad they were there no matter where life takes you?
